Other Things.

Well, it's been a bit since I left you with my last blog, but I'm here and ready to post again, haha.

Work is still... work.  I've gone on and on about that enough already.  I think it's time to talk about other things.

Lately I've been feeling rather off.  Things are not quite popping for me.  That is fine, and that's okay, it's life, and I get that.  My days seem rather mundane, not in a negative sense, but in the sense that everything is almost the same... there's not much variety.  Again, it's life... and right now, and I'm sure as life goes on, I'm learning how to digest that in my daily life.  I'm not upset or complaining about it, rather, I'm unsettled and curious about it.  It's definitely something that is up to me to change, but there are times where I feel these days are necessary, because I won't comprehend or appreciate the awesome days that I experience.  And at least I'm not having crappy days, haha. 

I need to start writing again.  I haven't written a song in a while, and I can't control my creativity... it comes and goes as it pleases.  I can't turn it on or off.  I need to take advantage of it when it is inside of me.  Lately, when I'm feeling it, I am not in a position to make the best of it and express what's in my mind, heart, and soul.  It's hard for me to be content when I can't take advantage of my passion.  It really disheartens me.  It's like this: wherever I am, I'm not there.  I'm physically there, but mentally and emotionally, I'm not.  I feel like the shell of Eric Ulliman, because my eyes are telling of my mindset-elsewhere, but my body is there... I probably sound like a total creeper, but this is how it is. 

Today, I'm finding this to be my battle.  I'm dealing with the shell of Eric Ulliman.  I've written a song about these types of days, it's called Prisoner.  The chorus will really explain it all.  It is:

"I'm alive, but I feel trapped inside.  A prisoner in my own body.  Something's wrong, so I am trying to find- Why I'm not myself lately.  Is there something I am missing?"

This is the epitome of what it's like when I'm in songwriting mode, but can't take advantage of it.  It's also the perfect description of what it's like when I'm having the "not myself" type of day.

Anyway, I leave you all with this: We are all human, and we all have emotions.  If we are feeling something, it's not wrong nor is it right- it just is.  We can't control how we feel, but we can control how we handle those feelings.  That's what I'm trying to do today while surrounded by people who don't know this about me yet.

Thanks again to everyone who has been reading these, and supporting my career choice.  I am forever grateful to you, and I promise to spend a lifetime paying you back with the music I create.  That's what I plan to do, ergo, that's what I will do.

Long Days, New Ways, and Just a Bit Too Much Grease on My Pizza

Work... I'd say it's my grandest battle on the forefront of my life.  There's really no reason why I should oppose it, I mean, shoot- it provides me the paper to do what I really want.  But, I don't want to talk about work as much as I want to talk about how badly I just want to write and write my songs, then just play and play and play for everybody I can... and just spread my passion to the world...

After eating this rather greasy, but delicious pizza from Domino's- I am having this debacle, this itch, this rush to just up and leave where I sit and play on the road.  I'm just so scared of this whole poverty issue, it's too much to risk, but at the same time, I need to risk it to really give it a go!!!--how am I supposed to do this without going under and putting myself in a terrible debacle in my life???!!!???

I need to get going, but I wanted to post something quickly on here to keep it up to date.  I really hope that you guys have an awesome night!  Thanks for reading and supporting my career choice.

Until next time- stay classy folks!

Working Till You Drop

So, as some may know, I work as an electronics/wireless/photo associate at a well-known corporation in order to make ends meet.  In this job, I meet SEVERAL TYPES of people... some of which are waaaay out there.

I met a man today who made me crack up.  He was telling bout his ENTIRE life.  He has owned several companies, one of which made $28 Million the second year it was in business.

This was all fine and dandy, but then he went into telling me about how he did all types of drugs and was just a party man.  He's traveled all across the world, and done any and every thing one could fathom.  His life came to an abrupt halt when he was slammed into on the road by a man going 60MPH.  I felt terrible for this guy, he is in poor physical condition, but sure as hell he had the most positive attitude I've ever experienced.  As weird as he was, and such, he left me with this feeling that I can do anything I want in life, and that I will be okay in my journey through my career as a singer/songwriter.  He told me he thought I had the right attitude and mindset to make it with whatever I want to do in life... this was uplifting.  This was epic... I was so thankful.

Like I said, this guy is definitely out there... like, OUT THERE... but I now feel I am going to be fine and that I'm on the right track with my career goals... as hard and annoying as it is having to work another job to make ends meet.

Several times I've thought about giving up, because I'm very fed up with this part-time retail job... I can't stand it.  But it seems that every time I get those feelings, someone will enter my life and tell me to keep doing what I'm doing, and that I'll get where I want, and not to give up.  It's weird, but I now believe even more than ever in God and his use of people as angels... this is my calling, to be a singer/songwriter, but the fact that at my most trying times, someone steps in to tell me to keep going, and I'll get there soon enough, tells me that I am okay, and God's got my back.  How cool of a feeling is that?!

Anyway, I don't mean to get evangelical on you guys, that's not my main point... I just wanted to express how awkwardly shocking it is that I'm constantly supported and pushed to not give up when times are so wearing and I'm treading to keep afloat.

Life is grand, life is beautiful, life is what you make it... it's all about attitude and where you are...

I can taste my success even though it's not here quite yet... I'm closer than I've ever been though, with the three projects I devote my time to... and I'm stoked about where I'm at in life.

Whatever it is you want in your life... GET IT.

First Post!

So this is my first post on my brand new blog!  What an exciting moment, right?!

Well, I wanted to set up this blog because I needed a platform to really share my feelings and thoughts as I transition through the stages of life, and especially coinciding with my singer/songwriter career.  It's been really tough lately, making ends meet and truly overcoming the adversities that come with living hand-to-mouth.

I just want to thank those of you who are reading this, and ask you to stop by every once in a while to check my pulse and tell me if I'm crazy... cause lately, I gotta wonder!  HAHA-but seriously, thank you to my friends and family who have supported my career choice and really held my fragile heart in the times that I didn't think I was going to make it.

Times are hard, but it's how we handle those times, that our character truly shines.

God Bless, and I will post soon!